I was on an SES callout from about 1000 this morning. It's now 1400 and I'm about to go home.
Do you find that the Sunday blues kick your a**e too? They seem to hook into me earlier and earlier every weekend. Certainly at the moment I'm finding that I'm going back to the dark times I went through at other jobs. At one stage at my first job as a lawyer I found the only part of the day I looked forward to was lunch, and that's basically my position now. And at the job after that I dreaded the end of Sunday. Not only was my marriage collapsing by then, but I'd go home every day feeling sick with worry and failure. At a very black point it was a relief at the office to imagine the sense of a noose closing around my neck.
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I keep it together at work by thinking of groups of five things that I'm grateful for. This really does help life my spirits. More substantively I'm also looking for a new job. This work is all very well, but the pay is low and the conditions dispiriting. I can do so much more for the world than be a labourer and factory hand.
I'm not sure where life will end up, but I'm sure it'll be good when I get there.